May 29, 2025

By Jamie Towey

Is life worth saving?

I’m a bit of a history buff and I also love a good story. In fact, I think that’s why I enjoy reading history. What’s a better story than the Battle of Thermopylae? Or the former pacifist Alvin York capturing over a hundred enemy soldiers at the Battle of the Argonne? Stories and history tell us about ourselves – who we are, how we got here, what we care about. Hidden in any good story are golden nuggets of truth.

That’s why Memorial Day strikes a chord with me year after year. It’s the one day where the stories of millions of America’s fallen heroes are all told at once. They are part of another story, a bigger story, a story of how America and her values are worth fighting for, even dying for.

I reflect on the legacy of a close relative (I’m leaving out his name out of respect for him and his family) whose memory America commemorated on Monday. This man served across the Middle East in our nation’s most selective units and lost his life from the severe injuries he sustained in defense of his country. He didn’t just fight to protect people here stateside; his actions protected the innocent in those far-flung lands, rescuing hostages and freeing the innocent from terrorist death cults.  This man whom I admire so much, whose children will forever suffer the excruciation of losing a father, believed that life was worth dying for.

The entire premise of Memorial Day is that the sacrifices of our soldiers, sailors, and aviators were worthy. From the patriots of our revolution to the marines at Okinawa, these men and women fought to protect our country from enemies without and within. Even those who fought in wars with controversial legacies put themselves in the line of fire in support of our flag and what it stands for: Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Soldiers, firefighters, police officers, and first responders of all kinds are respected across all cultures and eras because of the logical impossibility of their trade – they risk their lives for the lives of strangers. There is no utilitarian firefighter; if he or she can reach the person in a conflagration, it’s worth a shot.

We take all this for granted; ambulances rush through traffic, rescuers comb through rubble, all because life is worth saving. Atheists and the God-fearing can agree: we’re wired for life.

Last week, I was lucky enough to spend time with one of our Board of Directors members, Tonja Myles. Tonja is such an inspirational figure (see for yourself). I was with her and many other courageous individuals on Capitol Hill to explore how to fight back against the suicide and drug addiction epidemics in this country. Sheriffs, addiction counselors, doctors, US congressmen, state health officials, and even NFL star quarterback Joe Burrow’s mom and dad shared proven strategies for how to break the cycles of death and addiction. It was inspiring.

And yet, I couldn’t help thinking of a jarring juxtaposition.

I thought of the men and women Tonja described: broken, impoverished people of all races, many of whom had experienced serious trauma or time behind bars, and then of the lonely, abandoned elderly, disabled, and infirmed men and women pushed to the margins of society, suffering in the shadows. On Capitol Hill two Thursdays ago, everyone unflinchingly stood by the side of the first group. All agreed that none of them deserved to die because of their addiction, poverty, depression, or trauma. They deserved help and resources because of their innate dignity.

But in the state of Delaware, it was a different story. On May 20, Delaware became the 11^th state to legalize physician-assisted suicide. New York and Illinois have imminent votes to legalize it as well, and it looks like they may succeed. In these states, call-988 and suicide prevention resources are available to men and women who struggle with depression and addiction. But not to the elderly or the infirm. If they tire of life, a doctor or nurse can help them end it.

I asked at the beginning if life is worth saving; perhaps it’s better to ask, are only some lives worth saving?

Whether someone has two weeks or two decades ahead of them, we must never normalize suicide.

Look to the heroes of Memorial Day who died that we may live. Remember the story we tell ourselves about their sacrifice – that it was worthy, that it revealed the truth that all life has value.

What story are we telling when we celebrate suicide-affirming care?

(The views expressed herein are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Aging with Dignity and/or its Board of Directors.)